Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Ok, so I totally stole the title from.... everywhere. It's not original, I know.

Photo taken 29 June 2011

Mirror Mirror on the .... Floor?

I thought I'd fill you in on what was missing from my photo yesterday.

Photo taken 28 June 2011

Monday, June 27, 2011

What I See

This was one of the most difficult shots to line up that I've ever taken. And yes, I know you can totally see my remote, but at this point I don't give a damn! I also had plans to zip up my sweater so you couldn't see my rib cage, but that didn't happen either. Ah the joys of a 365 project!

Photo taken 27 June 2011

Sunday, June 26, 2011

I am All That I Can Be

At least that's what my shirt says.

Photo taken 26 June 2011

Saturday, June 25, 2011

I Chose the one Less Travelled By

Photo Taken 25 June 2011

Looking for Answers

Photo taken 24 June 2011

More Lines to Divide Us (a Political Rant)

A few weeks back, I received a letter from the Federal Liberal Party asking me to participate in one of their political conventions. If you follow Canadian politics at all, you'll know that over the past 5 years or so, the Liberals have lost a LOT. Every federal election sees them losing more and more support, and therefore more seats in the House. They went from a majority government, to a minority, to the official opposition in a minority Conservative government, to their current status of... well... barely having seats. The Conservatives have a majority, the NDP is the rising star with the official opposition.

So the Liberals are scrambling. Why have they lost so much support? They need new leadership (as the last leader stepped down after the election). And so, they decided to hold a convention. An Extraordinary Convention. A way to allow members to speak up, speak out, and try to get to the root of this problem. So they mailed out registration forms for the convention inviting members from every riding to become Delegates.

And yet... the registration form COMPLETELY rubbed me the wrong way. I'm offended by it in ways I can't even begin to explain.

In order to register I must certify that I am ONE of the following (transposed exactly as it appears on the form):
  • I am a SENIOR FEMALE; I am 65 years of age or older (as defined in the 2009 LPC Constitution)
  • I am a SENIOR MALE; I am 65 years of age or older (as defined in the 2009 LPC Constitution)
  • I am a YOUTH FEMALE; I am 25 years of age or under (as defined in the 2009 LPC Constitution)
  • I am a YOUTH MALE; I am 25 years of age or under (as defined in the 2009 LPC Constitution)
  • I am a FEMALE; I am between the ages of 26 and 64.
  • I am a MALE; I am between the ages of 26 and 64.
  • I am an ABORIGINAL (as defined in the Constitution of the LPC's Aboriginal Peoples' Commission)
Now, I'm pretty sure this is ageist, sexist, and just downright racist. Why do we need to be divided up this way? Why are these the only categories that matter? Why do these categories matter at all? What if I don't fit into any of the above?

Now, I've been a proud Liberal for years. They're not the perfect party, but they are the closest party to my political beliefs. I recognize that I don't always agree with them, but in politics and leadership, you can't please all of the people all of the time. I truly believe they are aimed as closely to what they want for Canada as what I want as a Canadian. And yet this registration form... well, since I obviously don't fall into any of their neatly divided categories, perhaps I don't fit into their party after all.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Branching Out

I finally found a tree I could climb!!!

Photo taken 23 June 2011

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Tree Climbing... 60's Batman Style

I went looking for a tree to climb. Turns out, not many choices. So instead, inspired by my hubby (as usual) I climbed a tree the same way superheros used to scale walls in old TV shows.

Photo taken 21 June 2011

Monday, June 20, 2011

Space to Breathe

A beautiful, gloomy, bruised purple sky, some wide open ocean, and an empty beach. What more could I ask for?

Photo taken 20 June 2011

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Can I fix it?

Cool rusty old equipment + me + my camera = some interesting shots. This was my favourite of the day, although I also have some of me climbing all over this thing. It was kinda fun.

Also- notice the arm cuffs. I crocheted them myself. Finally finished the large one on my left arm.

Photo taken 19 June 2011

I'm thinking

I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking

Photo taken 18 June 2011

I have a Secret

I don't have a Shadow.

Ok, this one takes a bit of explaining. My sister owns 2 cats. Secret and Shadow.

Ok, that wasn't a lot of explaining at all.

Photo taken June 17 2011

5 months down, 7 to go!!!

Wish I could stay here

By mid week, I'm exhausted. Seriously. 5:45am alarm sucks pretty bad in the winter when you don't see much sun, but it sucks just as much in the summer when the sun is up late and it keeps you up. I haven't seen darkness in WEEKS!!! It's GREAT!!!

Photo taken 16 June 2011

Come Over Here Boy

Have a Cigar, you're going to go far!

Photo taken 15 June 2011


Feeling uninspired.

Photo taken 14 June 2011

Monday, June 13, 2011


My husband told me I need to take more naked shots for my photo project. So I am completely naked in this pictures.

Photo taken (AND UPLOADED!!!) 13 June 2011

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Stop and Smell the Flowers

We went for a walk today, and found this awesome field.

Photo taken 12 June 2011

UN-Dress to Impress

So this is after a party with some co-workers to suprise our COO for his 1 year anniversary. We were told to "dress to impress." Well, here I am, with my chest binder peeking out after the evening, getting un-dressed to impress.

Ok, I'll be honest, I didn't dress to impress, I dressed to be comfortable.

Photo taken 11 June 2011


It was a warm, quiet evening, and all I could think about was how much I was craving a nice cigar to enjoy in it.

Photo taken 10 June 2011

Getting Ready

Ok, this is a bit of a lie. I no longer bind with tensor bandages. They hurt like hell after a full day, and are horribly bad for your spine and ribs. But they are much more visually interesting than the Compression Shirt style I currently use.

I have a leather sexy binder on order being custom made by a Crafty Friend, however until that shows up I make do.

Photo taken 9 June 2011

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Itching for Ink

This whole being on a tight budget to save for a house kinda blows. I was really hoping to have the background colour on my sleeve tattoo finished by now. Sadly, with our spending money cut to next to nothing and a wedding in Alberta we need to attend in a month- it'll be months before I can afford any more colour.

Sorry James, I'm trying to come back for more, but it's just not happening quickly.

Photo taken 8 June 2011

Belly Button

I've always loved my tummy. I think it's one of my best features. Always has, hopefully always will be. But I'm scared of the future. On my dad's side- all of the women look like they're 6 months pregnant. Slender women with this little basket ball of a tummy. Not what I'm hoping for.

Photo taken 7 June 2011

Sweeny Todd I'm Not

Gave Hubby a haircut.

Photo taken 6 June 2011.

D-Day~ forever in our thoughts.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

That Little Space Between

I've been having a problem lately. And I'm not sure how to approach it.

It's no secret that I question gender roles. Or that I'd actually prefer greatly to do without them. And yet I know that society only accepts the two. I live in an "either/or" world, and what I'd prefer is an "either, or, both, neither, all of the above, and none of the above," all on the same day. And yet this "either/or" mentality seems to be shoved into my face more and more frequently, in completely innocent ways.
My brother and his wife had a baby close to a year ago. Do you know how difficult it is to find gender-neutral wrapping paper for a baby gift? Everything screams "It's a Boy," or "It's a Girl," and for some reason I'm completely offended by that.

Friends of ours are about to have a baby. We went to buy them baby socks before the baby was born, and were looking at socks for the first few years of Baby's life. Again- do you know how difficult it is to find gender-neutral multi-packs of baby socks? And it wasn't that we were specifically trying to avoid gender-fying the baby, it's that it hadn't been born yet and so we just don't know.

When asked if they knew yet if it was a boy or a girl, their response is "No, but it's a 50/50 chance, right?"

Wrong. Intersex children happen far more frequently than society likes to admit. And do you know what happens? Most often Dr's will decide the baby needs cosmetic surgery to "normalize" the baby's genetalia because the appearance is offensive. But that's an entirely different rant, and not my life. This isn't some big confession that I'm intersexed, although those brave enough to have shared their stories publicly have inspired me with their courage, while at the same time I'm angered and saddened by what they endured as children.

Besides the biology, there are also those of us who don't fit into the body we were born with. Some are lucky enough that they can switch sides and feel more comfortable after surgery and hormone treatment. I say lucky, but I in no way shape or form wish to diminish their struggle. This, again, is not my life. While I know with 100% certainty that I do not fit with the biology I was born with, I also know that a complete switch to the other accepted gender wouldn't fit me any better.

So what do I do? I stay as I am, with my queerness invisible. There are no accepted pronouns for the inbetween and others (sure, there is a movement to adopt some, but quite frankly I don't feel up to constantly explaining to those around me what the hell "ze/zir" means). Medical science accepts a shift from one to the other- in support of continuing the "either/or" world, and yet I would love to change some aspects of my body while leaving others in tact. Unfortunately medical professions think if you don't want to take a Gender Transition all the way, don't start it at all.

I live with frustration, feeling betrayed by my body daily. I live feeling uncomfortable with being invited to things such as "girl's nights" and baby showers and using public washrooms, as I feel a fraud, as though I'm accepting that I'm actually a girl. And yet, if I wasn't invited, I'd feel hurt and betrayed, as though my friends are pulling away from me, because let's face it, I'm a girl SOMETIMES. Really I'd just prefer if everything were inclusive events, instead of exclusive.

THIS BLOG ENTRY is one of the best I've ever come across. It's inspiring for me to read more from others who feel the way I do. His other articles, particularly this one are also quite thought provoking.

There is also Genderfork, with it's regularly encouraging tid-bits and thoughts, reminding me I'm not the only one to feel this way.

There is no solution. There is no magic quick fix. There simply is learning and living daily.

I began this blog as an outlet for my 365 project, as a way to explore aspects of my personality as well as document my life with a photo a day for a year. When I began, I had all of these ideas for gender questioning photos. And yet as I continue with the project, I find I don't question my gender. I'm not confused by it. Sure, I'm frustrated by being pigeon holed into it, but I know who I am. And so my photos are simply me, being me, doing what I do and trying to make interesting pictures out of the random thoughts in my brain. I'm continuing with the project, and I don't expect any solutions from this one rant- this was simply a way to get a few things off of my binder-encased chest.

Take a Pause for the Cause

Do I really need to say anything about this one????

Photo taken 5 June 2011

Bubble Bath

A deadly, deadly bubble bath. With ray guns. In the peaceful outdoors.

Photo taken 4 June 2011

Is the World Ready for Puppets?

I am determined to conquer the world and set up a puppet government.

The question is- is the world ready for puppets?

Photo taken 3 June 2011

Zombie G

It's been a deathly long week, and this day I was feeling it.

Photo taken 2 June 2011

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Real Eyes: Realize: Real Lies

So the question is- Am I the Liar, or have I been Lied to?
Photo taken 1 June 2011.

Holy crap- can you believe it's JUNE already?????

Who's there?

I really liked how this one turned out. One of my favourites recently.

Photo taken 31 May 2011


I've always kinda loved my legs. They always get me where I need to go.

Photo taken 30 May 2011